An icon should be here...Day 44. That number seems big and sounds grander than 7 weeks 2 days.

Not going to lie, I’ve been having strong food cravings. I try to pacify them with beef jerky and  pumpkin seeds, plus a couple crackers here and there, and maybe a couple of dried apricots or a few  raisins.
Why cravings? Why do you plague me so? I’ve been doing so well. 🙁 Sigh… I <3 food.

Something nice happened at the New You Health Transformation Center recently. I had just finished a Koyabell class and was getting ready to do a second (yes, I was crazy that day), when a new face walks up to me and asks if I am the blogging girl. It took a second to say yes because I wasn’t expecting that. I was utterly delighted when this newly born superstar said the blog had helped them start their fitness journey! That’s awesome and one of the things I was hoping would happen as a result of my candid accounts. Yay. Happy me. 🙂 You! If you’re still reading this, hello, and I’ll see you soon!

Moving on:

Free food! It happens so often for me right now! Another free food incidence at my practicum, and one at my school. I can’t escape! I have found that having a couple slices of fruit helps when faced with deserts and sandwiches. I have also found that if one has the option, if one is not in a meeting, if the food event takes place somewhere you don’t have to physically be, GO SOMEWHERE ELSE. LEAVE. SPEND LUNCH BREAK NOT IN THE SAME ROOM AS THE BEAST OF TEMPTATION. PLEASE! SERIOUSLY! Argh. Why is it always doughnuts? Or cookies? Usually both at the same time?! Even when there is a nice healthy spread they just have to tack on cheap pastries at the end. Breaking that ritual of sweet sugary closure to a meal is so very difficult.
Damned culture of ritualistic sugar consumption. Talking about it just makes me want it more.

Lady with mirror hereSo, as this is the beginning of a new week, it is time to post selfies in the private Lean, Cut, & Straight Up Jacked! group. I have really grown to hate selfie Monday. I find it frustrating. The pictures on my camera look different than what I see with my own eyes in the mirror. Which looks better in my opinion? The camera pictures. I wish my actual eyes (mind?) saw differently when I look into a mirror. I suppose that makes the selfies a positive exercise, but my desire to see what I want to see in that real life moment remains. I’ll get there.
Now, the existence of this discomfort at the forefront of my mind is equally annoying as the distorted vision I experience. This started some thoughts though. Why am I feeling this discomfort? What images of beauty or desired features am I comparing my self to? Excellent question. I decided that I am comparing my self to an ideal I have constructed, based on a collection of features formed over time from consumption of various media. What does that mean? Stylized images and models, who are posing.
The thing about posing, is that if it feels uncomfortable, you are probably doing it right. Those are not slack bodies we see in photo shoots. Modelling requires holding poses, cycling through variations, changing what muscles are flexed, shifting where you hold your breath in your body, etc…
So, to try and change how I feel about selfie Mondays, this particular Monday (yesterday technically), I decided I would take some pictures flexing. Muscles are not visible, I’m still “renaissance soft” as I like to say, but there is a significant difference in the photos, at least in my eyes.
Oh, and I also did 100 kettlebell swings before the pictures. That always helps me feel more positive and confident.
This experiment was a positive experience. Try this at home.

Here are 2 pictures, 1 with flex, and 1 without. Difference I do see.
(The bruise is from bashing into the tub faucet during a post-wrorkout epsom salt bath)

Unflexed side shot here

A side shot from week 7. Behold the un-flexed abdomen!

Flexed side shot here

A side shot from week 7. Behold the flexed abdomen! Not defined, but nice anyway.

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